Hello people of the internet!
I know no one, or almost no one will read this first post but I have been putting it off for far too long and so it's time just to write it. Let me introduce myself, my name is Amandine, I'm a frenchy who has had the privilege to travel and work in many different countries in the past 10 years and is finding herself in rural US at the moment.
Another thing you should know about me is that I have had health issues for the past 20+ years. These are the sole reasons for my dive into fitness, as I had to try and become somewhat healthy...something I have been failing at for the past 20 years as well, but this is a story for another time. The reason for this blog, and why I started it, is my latest near-death experience and what resulted from it.
Last year, partly because of my own stupidity and partly due to doctors lack of knowledge/taking me seriously, I ended up in diabetic ketoacidosis (or DKA), in the hospital, having trouble breathing. I was put on several medications, both of my arms with different IVs, and put on insulin for the first time in my life. I also lost a significant of weight in a very short amount of time. All of this left me barely able to walk, eat, or do much for myself for a little while. 2024 was dedicated to recovery, and slowly but surely, I gained, if not strength, endurance. I was able to walk by myself for more than 15, I started doing some strength training, and I thought I was doing good. I emphasize the "thought" here.
Last September, I started feeling pain in my legs. The kind of pain that my stubborn self ignored for a while until it would no longer allow me to ignore it. I got one opinion that shook me to my core due to my belief at the time that I had gained a lot of strength back: "You're weak." I will be honest, I did not take this well. I had worked hard and consistently for over 7 months to get back to my pre-near-death body and fitness ability (as limited as they were), and being told that I was weak felt like a personal attack.
Well, it turns out I was weak and tight. I ended up going to a physical therapist who took some measurements on me, and well, these were not good. I laughed... I had to laugh because it felt so defeating but comical at the same time. I have had a month of physical therapy and feel much better. The pain in my legs is basically gone, and while I am still very tight, I have exercises and advice on how to work on this. This is going to take a while. Much, much longer than I initially thought.
So here is today's conclusion: recovery is not linear, and things will likely happen that you were not expecting or desired, but it's ok. It's ok to feel defeated and angry at the lack of progress. It's ok to feel impatient. It's just the way it is and fighting it won't help anyone. Welcome to my flawed fitness chronicles!
